life

Do you like asking what, how, and when, or prefer finding out why first? Knowing the why makes our lives simpler, more effective and more meaningful.

Whenever something terrible or unfavorable happens to us, the first question that comes to mind is, “Why did it happen to me”? Even before we try to figure out What went wrong and how did it happen. It is a human tendency to seek answers and believe they are not at fault; hence they try to save themselves by declaring that they are the victim. In contrast, understanding the why and finding the real reason for any setback is the best way to look at things objectively and behave rationally.

You must have heard about finding your purpose in doing something. Why do you want to become XYZ? You might have wanted to become an actor or a cricketer as a kid. Why? Because you wanted to be famous or enjoyed playing cricket or both. Knowing why you want to do something or become something is vital because it sets the tone for action and keeps you motivated in this life journey.

Whenever our country loses a cricket tournament, we all become cricket experts and pundits and give ten random reasons for what went wrong. The same happens in our personal and professional lives. A significant setback or a failed project requires sound reasoning and understanding of the situation. That’s the only way to find out the actual issue and fix it.

A fascinating concept used in root cause analysis is the “Five Whys.” This concept is simple, and we can use it in our day-to-day lives. It means asking five whys and, most likely, the answer to the last why turns out to be the real problem you need to fix, and the rest will take care of themselves.

Ask The Five Whys

Let’s understand how to use this method with an example.

Issue: You are not getting a promotion at work. 

1. Why? There could be many reasons; let’s assume your interview was not good.
2.  Why? You were stuck on a couple of questions, and your response could have been more convincing.
3. Why? Because you were not aware of them.
4. Why? Instead of clearly saying you don’t know or lack experience in that area, you kept making answers in your head.
5. Why? You lack confidence when it comes to saying No, or accepting your shortcomings.

So the fact that you are not getting promoted is not merely because your interview did not go as expected. It is because you need to learn to say No, accept your weak areas and work on them. Everyone will respond differently to the five whys in this example and any scenario. 

Pause Here

Stop reading here and think of a problem you are currently facing. Ask “why” five times and answer honestly. Did that work? No need to tell the root cause, but it did help simplify the issue and give your new perspective, do share in the comments.

Five whys is an excellent way to introspect and discover the real problem. It helps us enhance our critical thinking and deal with our cognitive biases effectively.

You can use it in almost every aspect of your life. The exercise can be done individually or in a group depending on the problem we are trying to fix. It’s like peeling the onion, layer by layer, it might make you cry, but eventually, you will see things much more clearly.

Why Is “Why” So Crucial?

The human mind doesn’t like complexity and loves simpler things. “Knowing The Why” comes to the rescue as it removes uncertainty and vagueness. Finding answers to why leads to closure and clarity.

Knowing the Why Gives Clarity

We have clarity in everything we do when we know the why. 

Hence, we make good decisions and perform well whenever we get any responsibility. Remember how kids keep asking questions unless they are convinced? They are much more evolved than adults, who are afraid and blinded by their perceptions and fears. So next time you are unsure why, ask questions and get clarity. 

Knowing the Why Gives Closure

Understanding the why not only helps to identify the problem areas in life. It also helps us find closure whenever we need it the most. We often hear the phrase “close the loop,”, especially in a professional setup. It means we look for a meaningful conclusion or at least some sort of closure. Our mind doesn’t like unfinished things because it makes thinking unclear, and we cannot move forward. 

Suppose you broke up with your partner. It is never a great feeling. Everyone has their coping mechanism, and it may take days, months or years to recover from this personal setback. Yet, we never fully recover unless we let go, which happens once when we know why it did not work. Once we truly understand the reason and learn our lessons, we are ready to move on.

Wrapping up

Whenever there is doubt in our mind, it is because we don’t know the why. And are probably figuring out what, when or how. Ensure to find out the why of anything; it doesn’t mean that what’s, how’s, and when’s are not worthy. It’s just that they all work best when why crystal clear. Agree? Not agree? If not, why. Do let me know!